Photo by singleparentspecials

It doesn’t matter if you are a single parent because of separation, bereavement, your partner having to work away for extended periods of time, or any other reason, you’ll still face the same practical challenges.

You have to make the day-to-day decisions by yourself, things like picking up the kids from day care, school and sports activities, as well as the mundane (yet trying) decisions like what to have for dinner.

Help is out there

An Internet search on “single parents” yields a surprising number of dating sites, several of which are rather cheesy. Two sites offering information, helpful articles and networking beyond dating are the Single Parents Network and Lone Parents.

At Single Parents Network, members have shared web sites, articles, books, friendship and support since 1997. Some of the content reflects individual opinions, and some is rather moralizing. But if you can get past that you’ll find good, objective tips and articles, written by educators and other professionals, on various aspects of single parenting.

In the UK, Lone Parents aims to put single parents in touch with each other, globally, nationally and regionally. This network has around 10,000 members and has been around for eight years. Communication is through a members’ only forum and chat room.

There’s also a separate members’ only dating forum. One of the things I like about Lone Parents is that they offer links to a variety of other resources relevant to single parents, including Job Centre (a government-run nationwide job search site), a national child care web site, a counseling directory and much more.

Photo by lindsayshaver

Single parents traveling

I’ve traveled as a single mother since 1988, when my oldest daughter took her first flight at 11 weeks. (Tip: The best way to calm a baby down during flight, especially for take-off and landing, is to breastfeed.) My youngest daughter was born in 2001 in China. Her first flight was on her first birthday, traveling to her new home in Norway.

Back in 1988, before the Internet, the only resource I had was the first edition of Travel with Children, by Lonely Planet co-founder Maureen Wheeler. Though not specifically intended for solo parents, I’ve found much of her advice very useful.

She discusses how children want familiar food, while parents are eager to sample local fare. Her idea: why not do both? First, let the kids have their meals, then go to a local restaurant afterwards. When my oldest daughter was 4, we travelled around South-East Asia for a while and I found this advice to be brilliant. It meant I didn’t have to eat a single hamburger. Also, when she was no longer hungry, my daughter was curious about my food. At the end of our trip, she no longer wanted hamburgers either.

Today, there’s so much information available on traveling with children, choosing what to read can be a chore. Below is a list of good resources for traveling single parents.

North America

Single Parent Travel was created in 1983 by Brenda Elwell, a single mom. In 2001 she published The Single Parent Travel Handbook, and brought Single Parent Travel online. The site is currently run by single dad John Frenaye, travel communist for msnbc.com.

Their trips section is rather heavy on cruises and resorts in the Caribbean. (Royal Caribbean, Carnival Cruises and Beaches Family Resorts are among their sponsors.) They also offer a horsebackriding vacation in November. If this interests you, have a look at (or subscribe to) their monthly newsletter.

UK

Travel companies catering to single parent travel abound in Europe. Here are a few in the UK:

Responsibletravel.com was the world’s first dedicated travel agent for responsible travel. They select only travel companies with low environmental impact, and offer 8 trips specifically designed for single parents in destinations such as Croatia, Finland, Turkey and Egypt.

Mango is run by two single parents. They organize single parents’ vacations in the UK and abroad, including skiing holidays and Serengeti safaris. Their trips focus on parents and children spending quality time together, so they don’t offer kids-only activities.

Small Families claim being single with kids is no barrier to a good holiday. From weekends in Cambridge to weeks in the Galapagos, their trips have been featured in various UK newspapers.

Photo by limaoscarjuliet

For 10 GBP per year you can join the Single Parent Travel Club, which aims to link together anyone traveling alone with children (not just single parents). The club is run by members for members and has been around for almost 20 years. SPTC organizes all sorts of trips, from meeting up in the park to traveling around Australia.

Australia

The Australian travel magazine Holidays With Kids contains information and reviews on various types of single parent travel, including camping, lodges and working on conservation projects. The magazine also organizes an annual single parent getaway. You can sign up for their single parent newsletter.

My number one piece of personal advice

Depending on their age, let the kids participate in decision-making. Respect their input on where to go, what to see, and where to eat, even if it might mean more swimming pools and junk food than you care for.

In many ways, traveling with a child is not that different from traveling with another adult – whether that means traveling to Thailand, or through life together. Your desires are of equal importance. If you want to hang out together, you have to compromise and it has to feel fair for both.

Experience has taught me that being a single parent is as easy, or as difficult, as I choose to make it.

COMMUNITY CONNECTION

Are you a single parent that travels with your kids? Do you have any other advice or resources you can share with our readers. Let us know in the comments below.

Some people are really good at payback. Consider Regretsy, the website run by April Winchill which displays and mocks all the terrible crap being sold on Etsy. Winchill nails the public humiliation revenge, with humor and harsh words when it comes to creations like the Eco Friendly Mountain Girl Barefoot Sandals and the Lion Tamer Jungle Bra.

Maybe you’re not the most creative person when it comes to mapping out a revenge plan, or maybe you’re more passive aggressive than Winchill. True, it’s hard to be original in a world hell bent on flaming bags of dog poop.

Or you could try my neighbor’s approach to getting even with me and my roommates for throwing a keg party. For them, pooping on our front stoop was the answer. Just a few nights ago, our house got egged. Some people can’t let go.

Photo by gingerpig2000

The world is filled with bitter people stung by the jerks of their past. The following sites make it easy: all you need is some extra cash and a real black soul.

Boxed Revenge

This site sends unusual boxed gifts to people who deserve ill treatment, like a double-fisted-drinking-party-animal wife, or a lazy, beer swilling, good-for-nothing husband.

Some of their products include:

Chocolate flavored laxatives – Despite the telltale packaging, this is a real sweet revenge.

Animal skulls – No fear, the disclaimer notes: “These are road kill or died naturally and found in the wild.”

Roadkill – If you have a spare $50 hanging around.

Horse crap and cow manure – Also available in super-size portions for $30 or more.

Dead flowers and dead bugs – For the emo kid in all of us.

An empty box – To represent the emptiness of the relationship. Poetic.

A stocking filled with coal at Christmas – The perfect holiday revenge!

Crab Revenge

The ultimate revenge (and my personal favorite), this website’s slogan is “Make That Bitch Itch.” Yep, this site sends live crabs to your enemy, where they will take up residence in somebody’s pubes.

Their packages include:

Photo by euthman

Green Package – The standard package, with just enough itch to do the job.

Blue Package – Three times the itch of the green package.

Red Package – The mother of all packages, this high end package is also known as the “F Strain.” This package is so effective, not even Permethrin will get rid of the itch.

The site assures that it’s legit, but apparently legal issues have prevented the owners from divulging too many details about the business. I’m dying to know who farms the crabs in the first place?

Community Connection

Do you think revenge is petty? How would you plot your payback? Share your evil details with us below!

Photo by LizaWasHere

It took me hours to pull together these websites. There is something outrageously addictive about chasing cartoon animals across a computer screen or participating in impromptu spelling bees. Try not to wrestle the computer away from your kid.

8-10 Years Old

Addicting Games
A website with a huge selection of games. Try taking care of a dog at the Doggy Day Care, or shoot some hoops with Slam Dunk.

There are games for older players as well. Why not take down a college student in Don’t Taze Me Bro?

Andkon Arcade
Just good old-fashioned fun games. I must admit, I got distracted by the Bubble Shooter for at least 20 minutes, and failed miserably. Or try the Dress Up Yoda game and listen to his silly comments.

Photo by tinyfroglet

Discovery Kids
For the little nerd, this site has excellent educational games including trivia and puzzles. Keep the crabs away by squirting them with water, or get creative and design a bedroom.

5-7 Years Old

StarFall
A site that teaches kids how to read with phonics. Cutesy characters and big fonts help kids sound out letters slowly by following a story, like My Horse Glory. Say it with me: M-y H-ORR-s Gl-or-eeee.

Club Penguin
If your kid has a particular desire to dress, act and socialize like a penguin, this is the site to visit.

Dreambox
The website name cleverly disguises the fact that this site has online math games for kindergartners to third graders. Try a trial version to inspire some mathematical love.

Poptropica
A more personalized experience, kids are able to pick the age, gender and appearance of their character. I took Calm Owl on an epic journey through Early Poptropica, and then Nabooti for a “Choose Your Own Adventure.” The perfect game for wanderlusters.

Webkinz
Webkinz is like the exclusive VIP section of the gaming world for toddlers – unlimited access requires purchasing a Webkinz stuffed animal. Once the kid has access, he or she can play games and interact with their animal like a virtual pet.

Photo by Theme Park Mum

Kaboose
Games for kids AND moms. Have the little ones play Fishin Mission while you kick butt at Super Hyper Spider Typer. (Nailed that one, by the way. Let’s see how you do.)

Preschoolers

Sesame Street
It’s hard to resist the charm of Cookie Monster as he counts oranges in Spanish. Kids can also play Magical Numbers with the Count and learn shapes with Big Bird.

PBS Kids
For the kids who want to get to know their favorite cartoon characters a little better. Clifford the big red dog is always willing to play, or they can explore Storybook Village with Super Why.

TreehouseTV
Print off some Bernstein Bears coloring pages or play games based on kids’ favorite cartoons.

Nick Jr
Games for preschoolers, including endless Dora the Explorer possibilities and other familiar characters like Max and Ruby.

Finally, if you’re a parent worried about the kind of content your kid is browsing through, check out KidZui. This is the mother of all toddler gaming browsers, allowing access to 2.5 million sites, games and videos approved by teachers and parents. And it’s free!

Community Connection

Let your child’s creativity run wild with Tux Paint. For more serious gaming, learn more about World of Warcraft or the colorful world of Second Life.

Do you think when he wrote about these repeating patterns and ideas found in human culture, he for a moment envisioned a future filled with grammar nazis, women farting into pudding or cats in fruit helmets?

Now, there are literally thousands of these repeating images, viral videos and stories reproducing their way across the internet. Here are just a few for you to explore then send to a friend who can send to his friend and her friend and so on.

1. Kids Doing Stuff

It all began with that creepy dancing baby that began wiggling and squirming its way across computer screens in 1996. The original baby danced to Hooked on a Feeling. Now the baby dances to everything.

Now, you can find kids doing everything from chasing cars, destroying property, and everyone is a sucker for a kid playing a ukelele.

2. Is It Peanut Butter Jelly Time?

In 2002 a badly pixelated banana danced on to the scene to the tune of Peanut Butter Jelly Time by the Buckwheat Boyz.

Does the repetitive beat pull us to a universal desire for tribal drums? Maybe it goes back further, delving deep into the monkey brain to say, “Hey, I like bananas.”

3. Excuse Me Sir, Do You Know Who Took My Kidney?

Who hasn’t heard the travel horror story of going to some foreign country — the foreigner the better. You trust someone, pay for a tour, go out for a drink and the next thing you know, you wake up in a bathtub without your [insert body part here]. Chances are whatever crucial organ was brutally removed from yourself will be carried out in a dirty Styrofoam container to be sold for tens of thousands on the black market.

Want to know if a rumor is actually true? Check out http://snopes.com. Want to see how this rumor has grown, mutated and been turned into it’s very own meme? Check out Charlie the grouchy magical unicorn.

So when are we going to Candy Mountain?

4. Literal Music Videos

Have you ever tried to make it to the end of Men Without Hats’ video for Safety Dance? Not a particularly easy task. Now, change the words, mix it up a little, make it literal and it’s infinitely more watchable.

Now apply this to Bonnie Tyler’s Total Eclipse of the Heart and you turn an unintelligible attempt at being mystically deep into this:

Favorite part? I walk onto a terrace where I think I’m alone, but Arthur Fonzarelli’s got an army of clones. Or maybe it’s the strip football? Staring at the swim team gets you killed by a gang of dancing ninja men who know how to twirl? So hard to choose.

5. The Bait & Switch, Rickroll

One of the oldest, most illustrious of all internet memes. This began when one day someone received a link to a particular topic. You follow the link in said article or e-mail and next thing you know you’re watching a video of Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up. Bottom line, you think you’re getting one thing. You get another. You think you’re going to see naked photos of Jessica Alba and end up with a shrieking zombie face designed to scare the crap out of you.

Recently we find the appearance of what is called the Russian Rickroll.

Why it’s called that, I’m not quite sure. Maybe because it’s just purely random. Perhaps because you think you’re going to see something different and really it’s just a badly lipsynched song from a popular Russian singer. I dunno. You tell me.

6. Watching People Resist the Urge to Vomit & Other Reaction Videos

2girls1cup appeared on the scene a couple of years ago. Around that time, I tried to watch it. I made it through about two minutes and haven’t been back since. The follow video pretty much documents my own reaction.

Then watch the Marine reaction, the Ghetto reaction and the Muslim reaction Notice how the retching sound seems to cross all cultural and religious boundaries. Notice how no matter how bad, no one actually stops watching.

And as usual, Family guy has a response.

7. It’s Too Painful, Yet I Have To Watch

Blame Bob Sagget and his bloopers, but everywhere you go you’ll find someone being dragged, bumped bounced or making complete asses of themselves. We cringe and then watch again and again.

From the treadmill fail to watching the worst sports announcer in the history of sports announcements.

He started off good but then eventually but the ball state but women’s team shot down and ended up doing poorly. Need I say more?

8. Oh, How We Love to Dance

From wedding dances to baby breakdancing (who the hell is that talking in the video?), we simply cannot resist the urge to pass these along.

Most memorable? The Evolution of Dance.

9. Watch that Polyglot Gummy Shake His Ass

Normally, you wouldn’t think one video dubbed into ten or so languages would be its very own meme. According to Know Your Meme, it absolutely qualifies as a 100% full-fledged meme.

10. Scientific Wonders & Other Things You Do With Candy

Grapes or poptarts bursting into flames in the microwave, the killer combination of Pop Rocks and soda pop and mentos creating the explosive yet infinitely entertaining fountain of delight. We never tire of what amazing wonders evolve from the average sugary snack.

COMMUNITY CONNECTION

What is it about these memes that create the desire in us to watch, repeat and send them along? Share your thoughts — and your favorite memes — in comments below.

Yesterday, our very own Candice Walsh took us on a tour of the sordid, silly and surreal world of Chatroulette. Today, I ask where will this latest fascination take us?

What is the allure of ChatRoulette?

It is a challenge to find the weirdest, most interesting, most sexually odd stranger. It is anonymity. When you don’t have a name, you can say what you like and not take responsibility. That is extremely liberating.

It is human contact. It is human contact with absolutely no strings attached. We all wonder what it would be like with a stranger. It is a chance to see a naked stranger possibly shirtless and masturbating..

It is a search for the self. Deep down, how many of us hope that we’ll find our doppelgangersoulmateselfstranger?

Photo by Buzzfeed

Every article I read about ChatRoulette discusses in detail the rejection, more than one describing the “horrifying” moment of watching your stranger reach a hand out to the keyboard before F9ing you.

It is as the name suggests, an opportunity to shoot yourself in the head with every flip of the keyboard. Yet, every single person went back more than once to this place where you can be anyone. A cat. A whore. A samurai. A complete and utter pervert. You can travel to Turkey or have a drink with a stranger in Amsterdam even if you’re under 21 and couldn’t get into the bar in real life. You can play “Make this face” or “Hey, I’ll draw you!” Then settle down for a chat with a nazi, ghost, skeleton or dog. Real dog, not just someone dressed up as one.

Only your imagination limits you.

Is ChatRoulette the So-Called Next Big Thing?

It could be.

Sam Anderson tells us in his New York Magazine article that “if ChatRoulette catches on, it might even swing our collective online pendulum back toward chaos.”

A little bit of chaos may be just what the techgeek ordered in this overly monitored and measured world. Who are we kidding? This isn’t just for techgeeks. Everyone occasionally seeks escape from the self to find adventure. That’s why we travel. That’s why we jump out of planes. That’s why hostel sex is fun, then you get up the next day and are on your way. Chatroulette provides just a small taste of letting go before you return to your normal life.

Says Jonah Lehrer at ScienceBlogs

Human interaction, of course, is pretty damn predictable. We’ve got elaborate rituals for dealing with strangers, thus minimizing the chance of a surprising interaction. (“How are you?” “Good, thanks. How are you?” “Great. Thanks for asking. Have a nice day.”) And then there’s the fact that the vast majority of our interactions are with people we already know, whether it’s family, friends or co-workers. So they probably won’t surprise us, either. The end result is that our social exchanges become tedious and rote. They might be rewarding, but they’re rarely exciting.

Many don’t get it, though. Just like people didn’t get online dating, then Facebook, then Twitter. They didn’t get it. They didn’t get it. And then suddenly, everyone realized they had to get it because if they didn’t, they’d be left behind.

I keep hearing metaphors for what ChatRoulette is like. Speed dating, urban subway ride on your computer, slot machine made of other people. This revolving door of metaphor is part of the not getting it. We’re all trying to get our heads around it. We want to understand what it is and what it means about us but don’t quite know yet.

-Photo by Rodrigo Basaure

Here’s a tip. If you hear a large group of people saying something like “I don’t get it. What’s it for?” you’re probably onto something.

What does the future hold for ChatRoulette?

The future of ChatRoulette will be guided by two things. Will it be monetized? Will it remain anonymous?

Andrey Ternevskiy, the 17 year old creator of ChatRoulette, provides some insight on monetization in an interview with Brad Stone in the New York Times Bits blog.

I think it’s wonderful that I do not have to put a lot of advertisements on my site to keep it running. I am not sure why it is so. Maybe because Google AdSense (the thing I use to show the advertisements) shows links to various video chats. I don’t think this is a bad thing. I actually think it is a good thing, because only people not interested or tired of using my site click those links, to explore other services.

How’s that for pure sentiment in our post modern, advertising media savvy days?

But can ChatRoulette remain alive with such minimal monetization? The ability to make a living doing something you love, be that travel blogging or coding anonymous chat websites, is hugely alluring. If Mr. Ternevskiy doesn’t do it, it’s inevitable that someone else will come along to fill the void.

The Case For Giving Up Anonymity

While the ability to say and do what you want with no strings attached is a beautiful thing, if you don’t know what someone wants, where they live and what they need, it is extremely difficult to market to them, thus making ChatRoulette into a business rather complicated.

Again, Sam Anderson nicely sums up the possibilities:

I found myself fantasizing about a curated version of ChatRoulette—powered maybe by Google’s massive server farms—that would allow users to set all kinds of filters: age, interest, language, location. One afternoon I might choose to be thrown randomly into a pool of English-speaking thirtysomething non-masturbators who like to read poetry. Another night I might want to talk to Jets fans. Another night I might want to just strip away all the filters and see what happens. The site could even keep stats, like YouTube, so you could see the most popular chatters in any given demographic. I could get very happily addicted to a site like that.

The ability to keep stats strips away anonymity. Without it, ChatRoulette becomes a different animal but one with a world of possibility.

“Like what?” you may ask.

Psychoanalysis.
Professional or pop, you can log into a room looking for someone who will listen to your problems and hear you vent. Choose between Freudian, cognitive behavioral, gestalt and eclectic flavors. If you like the person you meet, you can arrange to meet again.

Games.
Here you can play chess, connect with a World of Warcraft buddy or even an entire group for mahjong or bridge. No, I don’t suddenly see a market for college mahjong tournaments, but it sets the stage for older users as well.

Babysitting.
Tired of your child sitting slack jawed and wide eyed while watching the same video over and over and over. Here you can connect with a real person who will occupy your child.

For an fantastic vision of what computer babysitting and education could be, read Neal Stephenson’s The Diamond Age: A Lady’s Illustrated Primer. (Definitely up there as one of my favorite sci-fi books of all time). We can require sitters to register and login with work history, favorite games, and even police record.

-Photo by Don Hankins

Online Dating.
It doesn’t take much thought to see how ChatRoulette adds another dimension to online dating. Instead of e-mailing for a week, you immediately connect, see if there’s attraction before wasting time with an awkward, man-you-seemed-cool-but-in-real-life-you’re-a-lot-doughier-than-I-expected night on the town.

Art and Entertainment.
Flip between live shows, plays, improv, comedy, and it’s all there just for you, the audience of one or however many happen to be in front of your monitor at the moment. The longer the audience stays with a program, the higher the rating. Highly rated shows, as in any other system, get advertising.

Trivia.
Need an answer to a question? Connect with experts from all over the world on any number of subjects.

Parental Control
Right now, no one monitors you as you wheel through a world of strangers, but what happens the day some 12 year old logs on to watch two naked men in leather beating a third while a fourth jerks off in a corner. Suddenly, lack of responsibility doesn’t seem so funny anymore. And like Google executives who have recently been convicted of privacy violations because of a video uploaded to YouTube of an autistic boy being bullied, someone will be held accountable.

Any of these fit easily into many different potential business models, but once this happens, once we’ve begun to quantify, qualify and find ways to monetize as is natural in the course of internet entropy, we lose the spontaneity and freedom that currently makes ChatRoulette so damn appealing.

Maybe for now, we can relax and just enjoy this little slice of painful, horrifying, rejection with a side of titillation. There’s plenty of time to put order in the chaos.

COMMUNITY CONNECTION:

What do you see as the future of Chatroulette and other live video chat feeds?

]]> http://matadorlife.com/the-thermodynamic-theory-of-chatroulette/feed/ 12 http://matadorlife.com/wtf-is-it-about-those-cats-lol/ http://matadorlife.com/wtf-is-it-about-those-cats-lol/#comments Mon, 22 Feb 2010 14:15:01 +0000 Leigh Shulman http://matadorlife.com/?p=3974

Above photo by author. Feature photo byTorley

My five-year-old daughter Lila spends a decent amount of her time on YouTube. She loves hopping from video to video, and I always get a kick out of her favorites. The overweening appeal of cats — and the effect they can have on a blog or website — dawned on me this weekend when she found The Mean Kitty Song.

Over thirty one millions hits. Yes, you read that right. Thirty. One. Million. Hits.

It’s a cute video, and even taking into account the number of small children who, like Lila, will view this thing 30 times a day if left to their own devices, that’s still a lot of people watching a cute little tabby cat in action.

The adorable spiky haired guy singing? I can’t help wondering how many times he got laid because this video.

But it doesn’t stop there….

This video of a cat freaking out also holds its own as far as Youtube views with well over 9 million views.

Why is this poor thing acting this way? According to the video notes, she’s never been abused, she just doesn’t like men.

And finally, this next video of an orange feline clocks in at over 2 million views.

I suppose I’d also be somewhat miffed if someone named me Burger and Fries.

The Magical Allure of Kitty Cat Cuteness

Beyond Youtube, you’ll find a proliferation of funny and popular cat websites like Lolcats.com which features the ever famous cat in a fruit helmet photo. There’s also sparklecat.com apparently written by cats for cats. It even has a Cat-To-Cat advice column offering tips on everything from how to keep your human from dressing you up in costumes to methods of coping when your person comes home smelling of other cats.

Even the most hardened human cannot resist a pissed off cat dressed as a taco, two cats talking or yet another cat in citrus head gear, this time with wayfarer animation.

How do we harness the all powerful attraction of cats for our own websites and projects? I’ll let you know when I figure it out. In the meantime, hang in there!

COMMUNITY CONNECTION

Just can’t get enough? Take a look at photos of Matador member’s pets or learn more about taking your pet along when traveling.

Cards of Change is what would happen if Post Secret and Operation Beautiful had a three-way with Linked In. This website allows you to upload your new and improved business card in order to connect with others who have been laid off as well as potential employers.

Our mission is to collect as many business cards and stories of positive change of people who have recently been laid off and connect them with new opportunities from potential employers, business partners and people who make the effort to look on the bright side of life

The current beta form of the website includes a place to upload your revamped card to a searchable database which can be parsed by location. Unfortunately, it seems this search function isn’t entirely in working order yet. All searches I tried yielded no results. Hopefully, this will be functional soon.

In the meantime, I suggest checking out the Top 100 Cards list.

There you’ll find a former Chiat Day employee who now volunteers reading to children. Or Tiffanni who is making the time to doodle. And over and over, the message resonates from people who are living more freely, richly, openly and lovingly even though they’re not making as much money as they did before losing their jobs.

COMMUNITY CONNECTION

Photo by Zitona

Books are some of the few items most people don’t mind buying second-hand. There’s something charming about lifting the cover of a new paperback to find a hastily scrawled inscription on the inside, sometimes even a date.

Here are two ideas for acquiring books you’ve been meaning to read, while getting rid of the ones you never want to read again.

Book exchange websites

A few months ago, I was introduced to Bookmooch, an interactive community of book-lovers that uses a point system to trade books. The only thing you have to pay for is the shipping and handling costs. Basically, you create an inventory of all the books you want to give away, and a wish-list of all the books you would like to receive.

When someone adds a book to their inventory which is already on your wish-list, you are notified by email. The trick is to Mooch the book immediately before anyone else snatches it.

Photo by Lin Pernille’s Photography

The best thing about Bookmooch is that the point system is designed so that you can mooch more books than give away. You earn points for doing everything from adding books to your inventory to acknowledging when you’ve received a book, thus creating a lovely book cycle. You can even donate your points to charities.

Goodreads is another interactive website currently only offered in the USA. Here you can browse other people’s bookshelves, read and write reviews, and rave about literature in the very community-oriented forums.

Remember, however, that if you want to build up a good book swapping reputation, ensure your books are delivered in good condition. For bonus karma points, insert a little note with a “Happy Reading!” wish. The more good reviews you have, the more books you’ll receive.

Find a local book club

If you’re wary of exchanging your home address online with strangers, or skeptical about whether or not some people will actually follow through with the exchange, find a local book club. Generally book clubs are designed for readers to share a common book, but it’s a great way to meet other book-lovers who may lend you some material. Rounding up a diverse group of people will open the door for trying new genres or authors you may not have considered before.

If a local book club is not available, start your own. Network with friends and friends of friends to find a quiet location, bring snacks and indulge in the nerdier side of life.

Community Connection

Add more books to your reading wish-list with some amazing travel literature or spiritual reads.

Photo by isforinsects

We’re all guilty of taking the occasional break during our work to pull up some of those time-waster websites that bring such pleasure. In fact, the whole reason this article started was because Leigh and I were instant messaging each other to plan a schedule for the following weeks, only to be sidetracked by these glorious and shameless indulgences of Internet fun.

We apologize in advance for the amount of time you’re bound to waste while browsing through these websites, but really, they’re worth a look. You’re welcome.

1. Lamebook - Poking fun at all those wackjobs who use Facebook.

2. Stop Making That Duckface! - You know the look: lips pursed, orange-tanned skin, classic camera pose.

3. Awkward Family Photos - Complete with 80s hair and engagement photos.

Photo by wili_hybrid

4. People of Wal-Mart - Some people don’t believe in fashion.

5. Why the F*@# Do You Have a Kid? This hurts my heart.

6. Texts From Last Night - My favorite by a landslide. Are these people for real?

7. Fail Blog - The world’s stupidity on display.

8. Tasty Booze - Just some good bloggin’ fun.

9. Moe Jackson - Celebrity news and gossip.

10. Go Fug Yourself - Two hilarious girls blogging about celebrity fashion no-nos.

11. Manvite - “With the free Manvite service, men can finally send online invitations in keeping with their masculine natures – simple, straightforward and crude.”

12. I Just Made Love! - An interactive map of the world identifying where people have been getting down and dirty.

13. Awful Plastic Surgery - The title says it all.

14. Cake Wrecks - Deliciously awful cakes.

15. Reasons Why I Dumped You - From the site: “After we fell asleep after having sex for the first time, I woke up to find you cracking my knuckles.”

16. Regretsy - Handmade products gone awry.

17. Passive Aggressive Notes - From those who prefer to use the written word to give someone the finger.

18. STFU Parents - “You used to be fun. Now you have a baby.”

19. STFU Marrieds - Those annoying messages from the happily married couples who like to rub it in your single face.

20. F My Life - Short messages of misfortune.

21. Overheard in New York - Clips of crazy conversation from the city.

22 My Parents Were Awesome - How did your folks look before they were parents?

23. Super Poop - Funny photo comics by an artist named Drew.

24. Cute Overload - I dare you to browse this site without squealing.

25. Emails From Crazy People - The world is filled with all kinds of crazy, as proven here.

Community Connection

Do you have any sites to add to this list? We’d love to hear them!

Screen capture of Men With Pens website logo. Feature photo by Brocco Lee.

Oh, poor, James, um, Jamie, you couldn’t get a job as a woman so you became a man. Oh, I totally understand. Of course, you’re in your late 30s. It was so much harder for us women to find work and support our children way back in the 1990s. Of course there weren’t any women in the workforce making their way back then. James, you poor thing. You’re so right. I’m sure Simone de Beauviour would agree, too.

This fills me with righteous indignation

It’s like watching Betty Draper told that even though her husband is cheating she better stay with him because basically as a woman she has no rights at all in a divorce. Or how women weren’t allowed to vote.

Photo by Mckaysavage

If only someone had thought to address these issues of discrimination against women at some point in history so that woman could begin to achieve the same things as men.

Life can be so unfair when you have a vagina.

Is this just a deliciously ironic mistake in copy?

The Washington City Paper says this goes far beyond a simple constructed masculinity in order to make a living. That, too, was my first thought when I saw the Men with Penises web page. I went, saw the deep gray brick walls and that phallus-shaped object shooting through the logo. I thought to myself, what is that? Is it a bullet? Is that supposed to be a pen? What?

This morning, I check the Men With Pens website again to see a new article titled Taylor’s a Feminist — But So Is James with authorship attributed to James. I tried to read the author profile, though, but was led to a blank page. (I assume this will change later today, though.) Bulls-eye of success, indeed!

Luckily, we women are easy to manipulate and confuse.

What also strikes me is that Taylor-James begins the article with the ever provocative statement of “Feminism is starting to piss me off.”

I can’t imagine what effect that was supposed to have on readers. Certainly not anything cheap or tawdry like garnering our attention right from the beginning, roiling us up in a fine feminist frenzy against James or Taylor or whatever man with a pen is doing the writing.

Photo by Quinn.Anya

Then we find we are mistaken. Turned around, shaken up in our silly stuck ways of thinking when we find out this James is a woman. A woman who luckily, for the sake of her career, was given the ambiguously gendered name Taylor.

This female Taylor-James says she has kept the other-James’ secret, that she understands that all those years ago, it was so much harder for a woman to make her way in the world alone. She understands why the-other-James had to slop on a detachable penis and pretend.

Does this sound fishy to you too?

The original copyblogger article has almost 2000 tweets and 500 comments. And how high do you think the Men with Pens website has jumped in unique page views since the original article published? It has sparked discussion all over the internet, and who knows how far it will go. Today Show? The View? Maybe even Oprah?

Now, if you’ll excuse me, this 37-year-old woman who makes a living writing must head off and make breakfast for my daughter, and then maybe I’ll go get some chocolate to calm myself down a bit.

COMMUNITY CONNECTION:

Food As Porn

Photo by Shannalee T’koy. Feature by Theilr

Not since Georgia O’Keefe has one woman made inanimate objects seem quite so sensuous and alive. Shanalee T’Koy of Food Loves Writing fills her blog with soft, warm, tasty photos of fruit, bakery buns, brunches and the people who lust after them.

In spite of her fantasy-provoking and mouth watering photography, Shanalee’s writing and recipe style is down-to-earth and easy. She makes you feel like you’d just love to sit down over a plate of blueberry waffles and spill all your dirty details.

Food As Frugal Philosophy

Daniel Koontz’ Casual Kitchen is about cooking more, thinking more and spending less. There, Daniel presents easy to make, healthy and unique recipes that work easily within a budget while simultaneously offering thought-provoking food related philosophy links around the web.

First, brush up on Daniel’s glossary of Casual Kitchen memes before diving into discussions of ways to help the environment from your kitchen or new ways to think about rising food costs.

Food As Fashion and Art

Luxiraire, without a doubt, presents the most jaw-dropping and awe-inspiring creations I’ve ever seen.

Photo by Sean McGrath

The most difficult avocado recipe ever first caught my eye. Then I became distracted by a parfait. I’m not usually much for parfaits, not to mention finding the word silly, but Luxirare’s method of creating solid caviar-like bubbles out of a juice to use as a layer in the dessert simply won me over.

Food As Culture

Laylita grew up in Vilcabamba-Loja, Ecuador. Her recipes have been inspired by her mother’s New Mexico cooking, the Ecuadorian market food stalls and street snack carts and from the food she ate made by her Texas grandmother.

I found Laylita’s website while searching for a good humita recipe. Humitas are fresh corn cakes served traditionally throughout Argentina, Peru and Ecuador. The corn is ground, cheese added and then wrapped in corn husks and steamed. They can be made dulce or salada, sweet or savory.

Food As Obscenity

The food creations on This Is Why You’re Fat will make your stomach turn and churn, yet you won’t be able to look away. In fact, don’t be surprised if you find yourself marveling in disgust at photo after photo of the most horrendous, artery clogging, sickening food combinations you’ve ever seen.

Photo by Alexik

Ok, maybe the Oreo S’more doesn’t look so bad, but the bacon maple hot dog drizzled with chocolate sauce?

Or how about the infamous Widowmaker? Any food that begins with 1.5 pounds of ground beef, continues to a whole package of bacon and not one, but TWO entire packaged pepperoni pizzas has got to be worth a mention.

COMMUNITY CONNECTION

Have you made or eaten anything spectacular, disgusting or amazing? Share your favorite recipes and websites in the comments below.

For some of our own Matador food porn, be sure to take a peek at our tasteful beefy centerfolds or read our guide to seven decadent New Orleans desserts.

Feature photo bymatzukawa1971. Above photo by mandiberg

I’m a total wordophile. Love word play, puns, love neologizing when the occasion permits – and it’s surprising how often it does.

So when I saw Oxford University Press’ latest blog post announcing their new word of the year, I was sucked in like Augustus Gloop up a glass chocolate pipe.

Yes, the word is out. Oxford University Press cites its New Word of 2009 as… drum roll please….

Unfriend.

As in, I no longer want to be connected with you on any one of many social networking sites, but most specifically, Facebook.

The History of Dictionary

Samuel Johnson – scholar, literary critic and translator — wrote the very first dictionary. In spite of criticisms of him as an idiot from time to time, his dictionary stood as the foremost authority on the English language until the Oxford English Dictionary was published one hundred and fifty years later.

Alas, the ever changing nature of the English language drove him to distraction. No sooner could he capture a word on paper, the meaning, sense and usage would change. The English Language became his white whale — an allusion to Herman Melville’s Moby Dick — his never ending journey, and can in many ways be blamed for the depression and mental illness that plagued Samuel Johnson until his dying day.

Photo by glitter feet

Today Language Evolves With Much More Immediacy

I wonder what Samuel Johnson would do today with the internet, where you can literally watch language develop.

September 2008, Saturday Night Live put together a skit of a press conference with Sarah Palin and Hilary Clinton. It was fabulous. That night, I heard the word FLIRJ for the first time.

I immediately went online to research further, excited to learn more of this word I’d never before heard. And I thought I’d knew it all, in part due to my rather scholarly background in Literature and Creative writing, but mostly owing to the hours I’ve spent browsing certain sections of Craigslist then cross-referencing with Urban Dictionary.

Yes, my ever favorite Urban Dictionary. Where anyone can enter a word and definition which are then given thumbs up or thumbs down by anyone else who happens by. There you can find any word you could possibly want along with no fewer than three definitions.

FLIRJ was not there.

Wouldn’t you know, though, the next day it appears.

A Comparison Between The Erudite and the Troglodytic

I decided to compare other words from the OED to the UD to see what’s what.

HASHTAG
OED says” a # [hash] sign added to a word or phrase that enables Twitter users to search for tweets (postings on the Twitter site) that contain similarly tagged items and view thematic sets.”

UD says “its a tag used to talk about an especif [sic] subject on twitter. Once all the users use it, it gets a lot easier to search subjects at the Twitter search.”

TEABAGGER
OED says “a person, who protests President Obama’s tax policies and stimulus package, often through local demonstrations known as “Tea Party” protests (in allusion to the Boston Tea Party of 1773)”

UD cites multiple meanings “1) one who carries large bags of packaged tea for shipment. 2) [ed.note: we all know what this one is. if not, please look it up yourself.] 3) one who has a job or talent that is low in social status 4) a person who is unaware that they have said or done something foolish, childlike, noobish, lame, or inconvenient.

FLIRJ, however, still has yet to enter the venerable OED.

Other Resources For Building A Stronger Vocabulary and Improving Your Knowledge Base

Thesaurus.com helps me find words like troglodytic, erudite and the like, then allows me to switch into Dictionary.com with one click so I can look up words I don’t know.

Ambrose Bierce, traveler and journalist, compiled his ever snarky – a word that certainly didn’t exist in his day and probably would have pissed him off if it had – The Devil’s Dictionary.

This includes definitions such as:

DICTIONARY:
A malevolent literary device for cramping the growth of a language and making it hard and inelastic.This dictionary, however, is a most useful work.

Once you’ve compiled your entire list of new, modified and self-generated words, you can compile them to create your very own dictionary in Word.

Then check into Mental Floss Magazine for a wealth of wordie – lover of words – articles such as The Nautical Roots of Nine Common phrases or Nine Tasty Foods Named After People.

Yes, we’ve come a long way since the days of Samuel Johnson and his white whale, a phrase I might add that is also included in Urban Dictionary. Although I’m sure Johnson never gave a moment’s thought to what it might mean to be moby-dicked.

COMMUNITY CONNECTION

Do you have a favorite new word or silly online source for the same? Let us know in comments.

When you’re finished exploring words and fun facts, it’s time for you to start writing. Start your own blog in Matador’s Travel community. Want some inspiration first? Check out 15 Punk Rock Travel Narratives or school yourself at MatadorU and learn the tips, trades and secrets of the best travel writers in the business.