Comments on: Does Freedom Lie In Doing Things You Hate?

By: Manu Stanley

Manu Stanley — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 08:14:37 +0000

Contrary to my belief, I am not the only human being in the planet who hated driving. It gives a feeling of great relief to me. Well, I too prefer the good old way of walking, or rely on public transport. We, I know it feels like hell inside a bus in a typical rush hour Delhi morning. And the maddening Delhi crowd of vehicles with insane levels of honking, the bus provides some relief.

It is true that though we do many things in life in a good way, many of us don’t really like what we do though we are good at doing it. I feel that the layer that separates the “feeling good” and “good at doing, but not enjoying it” is very narrow. There are things (“necessary evils” like Physics mentions it) in life that we can’t put aside. In my case, I learn to live with it.

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By: Nick

Nick — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 13:50:19 +0000

Hmm, serious tongue in cheek is always good!

I think there are certainly different grades of like and don’t like. We have different words for them, after all – love, adore, hate, detest…. Though of course they probably mean different things to different people.

As for the litter tray, sure it’s possible to enjoy cleaning it out. Though not if you have to ignore the smell of the urine. Surely, to truly enjoy cleaning it, you must embrace the smell of the urine, or at least detach from it.

I believe that’s one of the central tenets of Cat-piss Yoga.

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By: Leigh Shulman

Leigh Shulman — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 13:41:09 +0000

So then we’re saying there are different levels of like and dislike?

Ok, how’s this? What if it is possible to truly enjoy cleaning the litter box? It might be disgusting in many respects, but perhaps the ability to focus on the positives of such act outweigh the negatives. Karma yoga uses this principle to a certain extent. If we can truly enjoy and not focus on the stinky cat pee (not an easy task), then we are most definitely more free.

A bit tongue in cheek here, a bit not.

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By: Nick Rowlands

Nick Rowlands — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 17:06:21 +0000

Hmm, I think there are lots of things going on here. It’s definitely possible to be comfortable with something without liking it. A particularly banal example is cleaning out my cat’s litter tray. Perhaps a better one, which you mention, is jobs. Many people dislike their jobs, yet they are comfortable in them. This is presumably one reason they don’t leave (that, and needing to eat!). I think many of us tend to prefer comfort and familiarity over actual “like”. That’s one of the benefits of travel – it takes you out of your comfort zone.

An interesting question would be, is it possible to like something you are not comfortable with? And is there a difference between “like” and “enjoy”. You can probably enjoy diving even if you are not totally comfortable with it. But do you “like” it?

I’ve just tied myself into some stupid semantic knot… so I think I’ll go do some public speaking instead!

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By: Robyn

Robyn — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 15:44:55 +0000

Jetpacker brings up a good point – here in Colorado many people aspire to climb all of the 54 highest peaks. I’ve climbed many of them but have avoided the most difficult ones due to my poor balance and fear of heights. Except for one that I did with a group of friends. It was terrifying for me. I hated the top where it was most technical (Capitol if any readers have been there). But I pushed through and did it and survived (some don’t). I did not feel a sense of accomplishment. I was just happy to be coming down in one piece.
However I also hated backpacking when I first started many years ago. Now it is one of my favorite things to do and I love being in the backcountry alone. As long as I stay off the high parts

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By: Leigh Shulman

Leigh Shulman — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 12:17:20 +0000

Would you mind giving some examples?

I haven’t found that to be the case. I found scuba intimidating before I took a course, but now I love it. I feel the most free and at peace when underwater. Most things, my fear of them far outweighs the reality of the fear.

Ok, there are a couple things, like skydiving, that I may never do. There are a lot of other things I prefer and want to try first. Then, again. You never know.

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By: Leigh Shulman

Leigh Shulman — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 12:14:57 +0000

Very true. There are many different layers and levels to any choice or event. We’re not going to like all of it.

So I suppose, then, the idea of forcing ourselves through certain things is crucial.

The trick is figuring out which things we must push through and which to leave alone.

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By: The Jetpacker

The Jetpacker — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 04:15:06 +0000

If you don’t like it, don’t do it. It’s not worth the stress, anxiety, even physical illness spent worrying about doing something you hate. Even when I do something I hate, it’s usually to conquer a fear. But I still fear it — whatever it is — even after doing it. I don’t feel liberated. I feel like I just wasted time that could have been spent being happy by simply avoiding doing the thing I hate in the first place.

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By: Robyn

Robyn — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 02:34:00 +0000

I think part of the equation is if there is a reward — maybe someone doesn’t like working out but they like how it makes them look and feel later, so they’ll get through the hour at the gym or running. I actually love running but I hate the getting started. But I’ve done it so long now it’s routine. I just do it. If we travel there are tons of inconvenient things we must do to get ready – we may not like it but we love when it’s done and we’re on our way.

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By: Candice Walsh

Candice Walsh — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 02:24:26 +0000

I’m not sure, I don’t think any amount of public speaking could ever make me like doing it. But you’re right in some sense, you just have to force yourself. I don’t think we’d ever get anything done otherwise.

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