A traditional Indian thali (plate). Photo by Shahoo
Matador intern Neha Puntambekar shares a few kitchen stories and her favorite Indian food blogs.
Most of my life, I hated the kitchen.
Indian kitchens are for women. Cooking, along with assorted kitchen activities, is what women do. Women cook, set up the table, clean up and make chai, while men eat, chat and watch TV.
The kitchen was a cage that I had to stomach just because I was a girl. I decided I’d rather not.
The Hungry Husband Argument
“How will you find a husband if you can’t cook?” concerned aunts asked. When this shattering question didn’t move me, they insisted I (at least) learn how to make soft chapattis and hot curried vegetables. When I did get married there was much exclamation and astonishment in the family. They then made it a priority to pull me aside and offer advice: learn how to make things he likes; don’t let him go hungry; get your act right.
A New Kitchen
Cooking turned from chore to a creative exercise, adventure, a stress buster, a thing we do together. The food may not be as good as that of my mom’s kitchen, but it is full of possibilities and much laughter.
We moved to Croatia soon after. Away from home and other Indian kitchens, my kitchen suddenly turned gender neutral. I no longer had a reason to hate it, but I (we) didn’t know what to do with it either.
The first few weeks we ate out or we ordered in. Then we got bored. Then, there was no other option but to give the kitchen a shot. Of course since we didn’t know how, our first few attempts consisted of boiled vegetable in tomato puree with lots of garam masala, and rice. It tasted awful. We loved it.
Inspired, we decided to figure it out how the damn thing worked.
Six Indian Food Blogs That Taught Me To Cook
That first year, we cooked with the help of anonymous bloggers plus additional help from YouTube and God-bless-Skype. Through them, we stumbled on hidden flavor, finally understood cumin and coriander and uncovered what it meant to ‘salt to taste.’
Cooking turned from chore to a creative exercise, adventure, a stress buster, a thing we do together. The food may not be as good as that of my mom’s kitchen, but it is full of possibilities and much laughter.
I’d like to share with you six of my favorite blogs. They are simple, rich and absolutely yum. If something is cooking in my kitchen it probably started off as a post here:
Awesome Cuisine – This is my go-to Indian food blog. It has everything from food recipes and videos to how-to articles, and I credit it for taking my cooking from atrocious to edible.
Dosa. Photo by InfoMofo
365 days of Pure Vegetarian – I grew up in a vegetarian household, so trust me when I say being vegetarian isn’t all salads, tofu and unhappiness. It so isn’t.
A Mad Tea Party – You know how some food blogs just scream delicious? Anita’s blog is one of them.
Aayi’s Recipes – No matter how much you love Indian food, you can’t eat Tikka Masala every day (seriously kids, don’t try this at home). What you need is simple homemade food like ‘Aayi’s Recipes’ (Mother’s Recipes).
Eat and Dust – When I grow up, I want to live Pamela’s life. Her ‘Eat and Dust’ is more than just a food blog; it’s a space for food adventures, and about the people you meet along the way.
Malabar Spices – I dare you to walk away from this blog.
Right, so my kadhai is making all sorts of the-food-is-cooked noises, I have to run before my lunch spills over. Be sure to let me know what you think of these blogs and the recipes you try out.
COMMUNITY CONNECTION
For more food fun, stop by Matador’s Cooking and Recipes collection.
No time for browsing? Try these recipes to celebrate Holi, the Indian Festival of Colors.
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20 Comments... join the discussion!
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Michelle, we tend to cook/eat vegetarian as well. There are just so many options, it never gets boring.
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Neha I really enjoyed this piece. In Pakistan the attitude about “how will you get married if you can’t cook?” is pretty much the same. Kitchens are definitely the woman’s place and not gender neutral. I’m so glad you were able to see the kitchen as somewhere you can be creative rather than a type of prison.
And now I’m going to check out ALL those blogs. Thanks for sharing!
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I think it’s pretty much the same story across the Subcontinent. A real pity considering the kitchen can be such a fun place to bond. Hope you enjoy the blogs.
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This past Passover, Noah and I decided we wanted to make an all Indian food seder to celebrate. Partially because the original matza was probably quite a bit like chappati, but mostly because we so badly miss Indian food.
Neha was my guide in all that. She shared this story with me and some of these blogs then. Thus, the idea for this article was born.
Thanks for sharing it with us! It’s so much fun to hear you talk about food and your rediscovery of cooking.
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Much to my Mum’s amusement! Those conversations were so great, and am stoked it all led to this article.
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I want to learn to cook this summer, so I’ll definitely be checking out those blogs!
And you have a very wonderful into to this article
Thanks for sharing!
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Thanks for reading Alaina, hope you find some good recipes here.
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Hi Neha,
I’m Indian, living independently in Dubai & a few months left to dive into 30!!!
My aunts are petrified about my lack of concern or (mothering – this means being overtly concerned about everybody around you) of people around me.When in India i always hated it when uncles asked for water & when given pushed it aside saying it was not the right temperature & when done right I got a great smile from them saying you’ll thank me some day for this valuable lesson.
great post,
Michelle↵ -
Michelle, unfortunately your story seems so familiar! Stay strong
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Hey N, very nice (and honest) article.
Though things are changing (for better) in the cities, kitchens are getting bigger and better in size (compared to the cubby holes we used to have) and it is getting more and more gender neutral; however most of the subcontinent does not live in the cities you know! Long way to go for all of us.
After thought: It is quite strange that as a profession, cooking, is quite a male dominated line of work! Food for thought
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Yeah Vikram I agree things are changing for the better. Slowly, but surely. Thanks for reading.
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Hi Neha
Glad you enjoyed the ‘Eat and Dust’ diet!
Keep on cooking!Pamela
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Thanks for stopping by Pam! Absolutely love your blog, the food and stories you share.
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Hahaa Neha, very well written and most Indian girls / women will nod their head at that!As a young girl I wasn’t ever allowed in the kitchen except to make tea or Maggi, so I grew up wanting to get into the kitchen and cook up a storm – marriage gave me the perfect opportunity for that
Got here from Pam’s tweet – i have checked the 365 Vegetarian so far – so will check it out!↵ -
Haha, Nandita, I made only tea and maggi (don’t you just love maggi?) till I got married because I refused to get bullied into cooking. And while I enjoy cooking (a lot) now, I still get annoyed when I am in India and get accosted about my cooking abilities.
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I echo your trust in A Mad Tea Party. Her Kashmiri meatballs make my mum obsolete.
Try vahrevah.com (smoothly translated as ‘wow oh wow’)
As a child, this guy obviously couldn’t decide between being an entertainer and a cook. Through his videos he remains both.I started cooking myself when I moved out of India. Before that I left that mundane task to moms and maids. But here in Europe, my palate could never get anchored in spaghetti and I needed more spice in my food than just salt.
As an expat I’ll never really become one of ‘them’. And most certainly I’m not who I once was. Living in this homeless cusp can be bland and frightening. At times like these I scatter hot spices in a hot pan, and riding on those smells I take the cheapest flight back home.
Thanks for the tips Neha. Now if you’ll excuse me, my meatballs are waiting.
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Thanks for stopping by Rishabh, always good to hear from you! Thanks for the link too, will check it out soon. Reading your comment I realized a lot of Indian guys begin cooking as expats. Unfortunately they stop pretty much as soon as a wife enters the picture (not talking about you here obviously).
Rishabh btw is a mean hand in the kitchen. He made the best bhindi (okra) sabzi I’ve ever had, and that includes my Mum’s bhindi sabzi. Taught me how to make it too, though it doesn’t turn out half as good.
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Very good write up indeed Neha. Enjoyed it. Keep up the good work.
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Wow, thanks for the links. I absolutely love cooking, but the only blogs I’ve been able to find have been baking blogs. I’ll definitely try out some of the recipies from these!
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